In case you can't tell, I like sports.
However, I've never been particularly good at them. I played a little baseball in high school, but that was something that sort of happened by accident: a friend gave me his glove to fill in for him as I wandered by fly ball practice (I'm not sure what he was doing exactly), and when the coach huddled up the team I was left with no choice but to run in with everyone else. Naturally the coach looked at me and said, "Who the heck are you?" Next thing I knew I was on the team, which carried with it the obvious advantage of getting out of class early for road games, along with a letter in baseball that drove the chicks wild. Or at least it would have if I knew any.
Anyway, I haven't played an organized sport in about a decade. My girlfriend talked me into joining this co-ed recreational football league (Manayunk Sport and Social) with a random conglomerate of people that she knows (our team name is "One Hot Mess").
Since I got talked into it, all the old anxieties that come along with being a physically inept dork that I thought I had gotten over years ago have come back to bite me in the arse again. I mean seriously... I'm 26 years old. I'm supposed to be comfortable with myself. How is it, then, that I'm so nervous about making an idiot of myself on the football field this Saturday and many Saturdays after that?
Let's face it: a career in computer programming is not exactly very good preparation for a season of football. I've been running every couple of days for the last month and a half since I got talked into this in a desperate attempt to prepare myself (which in and of itself is a comical sight... I sort of look like Little Mac from Mike Tyson's Punch Out running around with my warmup pants and my hoodie), but a few weeks of running isn't going to repair the damage done by years of Dungeons and Dragons, video games, and coding.
Don't get me wrong. It's not like I'm a fat slob or anything (yet), but I'm not exactly going to look like T.O. out there either.
Some of you might be thinking: "Come on, Yeager... what's the worst that can happen?"
If this is what you're thinking, than you were obviously never a nerd. I'll tell you what the worst that can happen is: all the girls on the team are going to laugh at me, my girlfriend is going to run off with the hot jock, and I'll have nothing but the warm glow of the computer screen and this blog to comfort me (sob).